Dear Self,
This is your space to begin. There is no pressure here. No audience. No expectations.
This journey is about noticing.
Not fixing. Not proving. Not performing.
Just witnessing.
So, you're graduating. Or heading off to college. Or finally tossing that student ID card into the abyss. And suddenly, you're hit with a weird cocktail of joy, terror, and âWhat if I peak at the graduation party?â
Letâs break it downâCBT style. Because when life gets big and messy, your brain LOVES to go dramatic.
When uncertainty knocks, here come the greatest hits:
âIf I donât have a perfect plan, Iâll end up living in a van (down by the river).â
âEveryone else knows what theyâre doing. Itâs just me.â
âWhat if I try and fail and become a cautionary tale in someoneâs motivational speech?â
These are automatic thoughts, not facts. Letâs challenge them.
Write it down:
Situation: Looking at job boards at midnight while eating cereal.
Automatic Thought: âNo oneâs going to hire me. Iâm not ready.â
Cognitive Distortion: Catastrophizing. Mind reading. Black-and-white thinking. The whole crew.
Balanced Thought: âNo one is ready at first. I can take one step at a time and still succeed.â
CBT teaches you to talk back to that inner doomsayer. You're not a fraudâyouâre a beginner. And thatâs exactly where youâre supposed to be.
Perfectionism says: âIf Iâm not 100% sure, I shouldnât even try.â
Reality says: âYou learn by doing, stumbling, and updating your LinkedIn bio 37 times.â
Fear of messing up often hides behind the mask of needing to be "ready." Truth bomb: No one is. Not even the people who pretend to be.
Time to rewrite the script. Try these:
âUncertainty is part of growth. I can handle not knowing everything.â
âMistakes are feedback, not failure.â
âIâve figured things out beforeâI can do it again.â
Stick these on your mirror, your phone lock screen, or tattoo them (kidding... mostly).
Instead of pressure-picking your âforever career,â try this:
Shadow someone in a field you're curious about.
Take a weekend course.
Volunteer in a role adjacent to your interest.
Behavioral experiments reduce anxiety by showing your brain it can adapt and explore without needing a 30-year plan on day one.
Many of us tie identity to our student roles. Graduation can feel like an existential eviction notice.
Ask yourself:
âWhat values do I want to carry with me?â
âWho am I becoming, not just what title do I hold?â
Transition is identity evolution, not loss.
Anxiety likes to lump all stress into one giant blob. Break it apart:
Need housing? Start with budgeting and neighborhood research.
Need a job? Draft a basic resume. Apply to one place today. Just one.
Feeling lost? Schedule a coffee with a mentor. Or your cool cousin with that weird job in tech.
Problem-solving > panic spiraling.
Instead of âFigure out my whole life,â try:
Sign up for one job board.
Apply to three roles.
Journal once a week on what lights me up.
Join a professional group online.
Every action counts. Small steps are the path.
Change your mind? Pivot directions? Take a gap year? Congratulations! Youâre not failingâyouâre adjusting. Thatâs emotional agility. Thatâs growth.
đ Final Thoughts:
Graduation isnât the end. Itâs the weird, wonderful, awkward beginning of something new. CBT wonât make the future less uncertainâbut it will help you stop turning uncertainty into doom.
So breathe. Laugh. Eat the sheet cake. Youâve got this.